The Pink Predicament

So yeah, I had a school assignment to write a piece about a color. So, I chose pink. I think it's pretty funny, so I'm posting it for all to read. Let me know what you think!

Pink and I have a love/hate relationship. I really didn’t have an opinion at all about pink when I first encountered it. I was the first girl grandchild on both sides of my family, so naturally my relatives felt the need to bombard me with pink everything from bonnet to bootie. I of course had no objections, all I cared about was that my tummy was full and had a clean diaper. Once I got old enough to actually see color I developed Swiss-like neutrality for pink. I didn’t hate it and I didn’t love it, but I knew that if one day I felt like wearing a pink shirt, Pink would have no objections. Those were the good ol’ days. But then came high school, and Pink and I have never been the same.

It all started with a girl named Lindsey, a name I frequently use for the villain in the stories I write. Lindsey and her toadies were those stereotypical cheerleader types that prance around in their short shorts, hot pink shirts and even hotter pink purses, thinking they were God’s gift to the world and the epitome of all men’s dreams. Oh you’re not a cheerleader type? Well then you’re fat and ugly. Let me affect your self-esteem for the next 3 years or so by letting you know that every once in a while. It keeps me from realizing what a loser I am. Isn’t this fun? It was easy to detect when they were headed your way. You’d catch a blinding glint of Lindsey’s blond hair from the top of the crowd and then see the flood of horrific pink trotting down the hall.

It didn’t take long for her to stop heckling me. She and her pink paraphernalia were no match for my whit and intelligence, and once she realized that it was all over. Girls like that don’t like being reminded of what they really are. But unfortunately my color scheme preference was scarred for life. It seemed that every girl I’d ever met that thought they were better than everyone else had some sort of pink accessory. So naturally I associate that loathsome characteristic with the color pink, tragic and unjust as it may seem.

Luckily, Pink has adapted to the situation and developed lighter shades that aren’t as obnoxious as self-centered. This light baby pink has become Pink’s redeeming hue, and is something that I treasure. My dad has a thing for that color. He bought a cashmere sweater in baby pink and proudly wears it to church and any other occasions he finds appropriate. Pink looks ridiculous on some people, but my dad pulls it off with style and finesse. Whenever I see that shade of pink I immediately think of my dad, and thinking of my dad always puts me in a good mood and makes me love my life. My dad is one of the best people I know, and he can always make me feel better no matter what stupid thing I’ve done. Light baby pink reminds me about how much my dad loves and cares about me, and that alone is enough to lift my spirits on any rainy day.

Amazing isn’t it? Pink can either make my day or break my day. Darker pinks make me angry and irritated beyond all reason, but lighter pinks make me happy and inspired. If Pink wasn’t adaptable and unique in its monochromatic spectrum I don’t know where we would stand today. But as it stands today, Pink and I understand each other. Pink doesn’t get angry and upset when I shudder in disgust at a hot pink purse, and I admire Pink’s versatility and beauty when I see my dad’s pink cashmere sweater. It’s a love/hate relationship, and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

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My Love Affair with Diet Coke

So, I thought that Diet Coke with Bacon would actually be pretty disgusting, but I thought it was a pretty funny picture and worthy to post on my blog.

Ah Diet Coke. What else is there to say? The crisp click then fssst of the luscious soda drink just makes my mouth water. The constant sound of bubbles floating to the surface of the can containing this heavenly liquid makes me daydream of the first time I ever laid eyes on my love.

My grandpa has always been a Diet Coke fan. We go over to Grandma and Grandpa's house every Sunday and they'd always let us have a can of pop once we arrived. When I was a child, and not mature enough for the taste of Coke, I used to drink Sprite and let my popcorn float on the top of the cup of my Sprite. Then, one fateful Sunday, my dad asked me to grab him a Diet Coke. I walked outside to the refrigerator and decided to be adventurous and try a Diet Coke myself. I gave my dad his drink, and then I walked over and sat on the couch. I opened the can, took off the opener (as was the custom of soda-drinkers in those days), and let the divine liquid trickle down my parched throat. And the rest is history.

Ever since that day Diet Coke and I have been inseparable. We take long walks in the park together, laugh at each other's jokes and funny stories of the day, and simply enjoy each other's company. We have the occasional romantic candle-lit dinner where Diet Coke and I prepare the most wonderful sweet and sour chicken. We'll go to the park and he'll push me in the swing or I'll hold him in my lap while we try to swing over the swing set. He even comes to visit me at work occasionally. He'll just sit there and smile sweetly as I answer the phones with a cheerfully, "Utah State." He makes me want to be a better person, which is really the type of person you want to be around right?

Our 6-year anniversary is coming up this November. We've had our ups and downs but we've always remained faithful to one another. The only time I ever have Diet Pepsi is when they don't have Diet Coke or when the Diet Coke in the gas station is tainted with the smell of Indian Oven. We both agreed that if I can't have him in his best form I will have to settle for second best. We're so compatible it's insane!
I'm sorry I haven't written in my blog for a while, but not a lot has happened since that baby shower. So I figured I'd tell you all a little bit about myself that you might not have known.